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Posts Tagged ‘love’

Weeks that last forever

October 4, 2013 2 comments

This week was a tough one. I didn’t think I would survive it. I did. I KNOW that days will get better. I’m trying to break my mind out of this negative jail that it has been locked in. Force is necessary.

One moment at a time

September 27, 2013 Leave a comment

When life gives you lemons…. I’m sure you have finished this sentence because we all know this saying. I have been trying not to panic with the world crumbling around me and my big move is NOW. I stress now, because I literally have to do it now.

I have been trying to calm my nerves about it and have been having a hard time doing so, but I know I can’t panic. This morning, “the day”, I felt completely overwhelmed and so I’m currently taking a break. I went to check some emails and realized that I have been given a sign. “One moment at a time”.

Recently I gave the Wrong email to a real estate agent and when I finally got into to email account I saw that I had over 12,000 emails that have been left to accumulate over the past year. I freaked out and been to delete them. Unfortunately, I can no longer check all delete so I furiously began deleting 50 at a time.

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This went on for a while, until I decided I would just take my time, check this account as frequently as the others and while in the account delete a hundred or so. I’ve been at it for days but the number of emails no longer seems overwhelming. It’s still huge but I know eventually, if I keep up with it, it will diminish.

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That’s where I’m at thus far.

So the lesson I learned from my email account is twofold.
1. NEVER leave things unattended.
2. If it seems like too much to deal with, just breath, take it a moment at a time and you’ll get through.

Life is far too precious to feel overwhelmed so let it flow as it may.

I giggled a little with this one

September 24, 2013 Leave a comment

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Interesting people everywhere

September 16, 2013 Leave a comment

I have been a member of a dating web site for some time now. I haven’t really pursued it, but when I feel chatty and want to chat, I do. Today I got an email from the site…

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I looked at his alias and giggled a lot. Bucketlisters? curiosity thoroughly peeked, I had to read his profile. I was not let down.

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I was so amazed by this mans honesty that I had to let him know.

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I think he was thrown off by my lack of disgust and judgement.

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He seems pretty cool for the most part and I hope he is able to move through the emotional pain so that he may dissolve the bucket list.

For arguments sake

September 15, 2013 Leave a comment

The hardest task that I face in speaking is speaking to someone who’s only only thought, when not their turn to talk, is what try will next say. I have dealt with this battle for a very long time. Most people I just turn from to save voice. Yet, with one, turning is not an option. I was in a sour mood today and had been talked to about going over the child support calculation again and it was not in the top priority of things to do. I came in less than pleased to talk about it, admittedly. When my “attitude” was called to center stage, I chose to switch gears. I calmed myself and spoke with rational mind. Even this change did not reap rewards. I tried to voice my frustration with the situation but that was met with more yelling. I tried to explain that trying to have a conversation with someone who was only thinking about what they were going to say was pointless and above all, talking to someone who would not allow me to voice my opinions and someone who already had the “right” version in their head was just not working. I’m done trying to rationalize with an irrational person. I’m just done.

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Addicted to the struggle

September 13, 2013 3 comments

Last night, as I always do, I found a guided meditation mp3 the “guide” me to sleep. This one was titled, “are you addicted to your struggle?”. As I listened to this track, I posed that very question to myself. I realized that I am, in fact, addicted to my struggle. I know my struggle, my single parenthood, my lack of substantial cash flow, my woes and I’m okay with them. I know how to move through them and I always find motivation to come out on top. I plan to shed that struggle.I no longer wish to remain addicted to the struggle in an effort to move finally forward. It will be scary to let go of, but I will and this will be good for all.

Change of direction

September 11, 2013 Leave a comment

I read my horoscope prior to checking the transformation assignment of the day. My horoscope suggests that I revisit an old goal with a new breath.

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I had been putting off getting my license to carry because I wanted to go to mass firearms school, but it costs a lot, especially because I’m pretty broke at the moment. Upon seeing this I chose to just go to my local police department and ill be taking the course before the end of the month!! New approach at an old goal.

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I’ve felt the breeze of grace. Welcome back to the upswing 🙂

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