Archive for the ‘Status=Single Forever?’ Category

Challenge the status

August 26, 2012 2 comments

I hereby challenge the status=single forever. I met  guy! I met him online weeks ago and never anything more. Then out of nowhere, he text me. It was random, the way I contacted him online a while back because I saw his pictures and thought he was really attractive, and so I told him so. That’s my style, I don’t really beat around the bush about anything. Anyhow, he contacted me online, which was frustrating because he had my number, I told him that too. He explained that he had lost his phone and all of his contacts. I text him so that he had my number again.

We started to talk through text and I began to notice that we had a lot in common and his look gave me butterflies. As with any new person, first you are physically interested and then you move forward. I also noticed that the way he talked also intrigued me severely. We communicated for what seemed like forever, he was completely smitten as was I. So much so that we decided to just do a face to face to see if there would be some sort of chemistry to back all of this intrigue. He works at a club so he wouldn’t get out until late, that was fine, I was not going to him, he was coming to me.

We would meet at my place, outside and just hang out for a half an hour max. We sat on my steps, talked like dear old friends until the sun came up. I finally had to tell him it was time to wrap it up. It was almost like we weren’t ready to leave each other, we just had so much to catch up on. We talked heavy, deep, light, flirty it was just a wonderful time. When we did finally manage to part ways, the smile lasted until I fell asleep.


At what lengths would you go to achieve a goal?

August 19, 2012 Leave a comment

I believe in going full-on for what I want. I may break for a bit and I may get discouraged at times, but I am always willing to push myself as far as need be for something I want. I couldn’t imagine not. I have been trying to get physically fit enough to get through the physical demands of trying out for an open position. Ever mention that I make to a friend about my “Training”, I’m met with, “don’t push yourself too hard” or “I would never…”. This can get frustrating, to constantly hear about how demanding this is, and that I should slow down, or not try so hard.

I finally asked said friend today; “if you wanted something so bad, you wouldn’t get up at 7 or push yourself to the limit?” to which I received this response; “No when I want something I just do it when I feel like it.”

Really, seriously? How do you achieve anything with that kind of “when I feel like it” attitude? And how do you expect to form a relationship with someone if your attitude is that of a child or a spoiled person, or some would even consider it as being lazy. I know that with every, “don’t work to hard for your dream” and “when I feel like it” ‘s I lose that much more interest in even building a friendship. Life is too short to hear constant negativity and I don’t need that in my life, I’m already nervous daily with the approaching date, the last thing I need is someone stressing how ok it is to just give it up.

Status #singleforever

When you finally find motivation to move on.

August 7, 2012 Leave a comment

I finally found what I needed to so that I realized that my 2 year relationship was full of lies and deceit. Two years of being head over heels. Two years of worry for not. Two years of mistakes and hard lessons. I have finally learned from them. I am not selling anything to you but if you would like to see the once love of my life, head right over to

He signed of for this account 3 months after we were together, however we had been talking for 6 by then. He was last on 3 months ago which is about the time he was asking me to quit my job, move in, and start a family with him. He went so far as to describe the single family home he was looking at the day before he “disappeared”. His profession is so far from what he told me and he has about 459 female “friends” on this online profile which he said he was not allowed to have. I only wish that he would have been honest because I had a lot at stake and he knew EVERYTHING about me which makes me feel as if he used that information to his advantage. I do, however, believe in karma and so all will work out for the best.

Message to you, if you’re reading this, you should probably contact for a cease fire because the more time that goes by, the angrier I become. I just want you to look me in the eyes and tell me what I need to know. Plus I really want my stuff back. If nothing else please put my kids pictures in an envelope and drop them in the mail.

Life’s challenges


I seem to be at a never ending crossroads in this life. I had an absolutely wonderful day at work. Saturday’s have to be my favorite work day in the week. Clint and i had a hell of a time trying to figure out who is taller, Keith solved the debate, without shoes we are the same height, i let him claim the 5’11 tho. Things got a bit dicey afterwards. Later this evening the boys andi sat on the front steps and watched the many fireflies.


I don’t know how many can be seen in this photo.

Bright lights…. Hammer on the head….. BINGO!

I have finally figured it all out! I only seek to be with unavailable men. I haven’t had many relationships in my life, but, I have just realized that EVERY one, with the exception of the ex, has been completely unavailable. Either having things going on, or like the most recent, had a job that was very much not one in which a relationship could withstand. I don’t know why it is that I set myself up like this but I guess this is yet another reason that I will remain single forever.

I would love to be able to look into someones eyes and feel completely comfortable, not self-conscious in the least and just know that the person looking back at me feels the same thing.


I think that I need to find a way to reduce the stresses in my life. I feel like I am getting old before my time. Day after day that goes by I feel like I age a year. I want to be young still, I mean I’m only 29. I feel like I should be in a home soon. I’m super exhausted and the stress is causing crazy problems. I feel like my blood pressure is through the roof and it should not be. I just do not know what to do.

On a brighter note, my twins will graduate kindergarten tomorrow morning. I am excited to see the finally get into big boy classes. They are already reading at a second grade level so I think they should do fine……..But maybe that will make them more arrogant then I would like. That is the problem I had this year with their brother in the 1st grade. He was already reading and adding and stuff, so he thought that he could let the teacher know by not paying attention in class. It took a while to get him to understand that, although he knows a lot, he still has a lot more to learn. He figured that out when he began having problems doing word problems.

Sucks to have such a long week ahead of me, worked one day and still have five more to go. I really have got to reconsider this whole Postal thing, yeah it’s great pay and benefits and it could possibly open some other federal doors in the future for me but……..6 days a week, split shifts which means I’m out for 12hrs a day, I miss my kids and I miss sleep.

Would be a bit easier if I had another adult to come home to, to vent to , relieve stress with.

Early bird………Worm?

Okay, so I’m awake. I don’t know why yet, but I am awake. It’s 3am on the East coast and about 30 minutes ago I just woke up, eyes burning but wide open. There’s always a reason for sleeplessness, the last time I couldn’t fall asleep it was because at midnight that night a kid woke up vomiting. That is usually the reason why, but I don’t think that is the case today.

I had a dream of him. I think this could be partly the blame. I miss him dearly.I love him always.

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